Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Another Round In

I can't remember which round it is anymore. But another round is in and I am suffering the side effects of its dose. I am taking my shots of neupogen everyday thanks to Nurse Mike who has become an expert at giving me my daily shots. I could probably do them myself, I have had so many, but its an excuse to see his smiling face everyday. That is always a plus with his very busy schedule. At least I only have to take them for the first four days after chemo, the last dose being the largest so the effects are usually gone by Sunday, so the first week is definitely the toughest. The docs are worried about my weight loss, I'm not, but I'm trying to be a good patient and eat more and I am going to look at supplementing with protein shakes for all the meals that I skip. I eat maybe once or twice a day, a very small amount. I can only take a few bites and I'm full. So I do the best I can and I try to make my meals count and eat healthy.

Fall is settling in and the leaves are quickly accumulating in my yard. I don't have that many trees, but my neighbors do and they all seem to end up in my yard. The way my house is situated the wind brings all the neighbors leaves into my driveway where they swirl and collect in front of my garage door where they stain my brand new driveway because they get wet and never dry out. So I have this black spot marring my beautiful new driveway and we have checked the internet to see how to rid ourselves of it and apparently a bleach mixture will take it off, which we'll tackle after all the leaves are gone. My parent are awesome trying to keep the leaves off the driveway daily, it seems to be an effort in futility but God bless them for trying!

We have gotten most of the yard work done in prep for the upcoming winter. Only a few tasks left. I want to put a cover on the pond, so if anyone is handy at making a nice round cover (its a very small pond) to keep it cleaned out until the spring. Its probably three feet round, so it should be easy to cover. So any handy man out there...I'm at your mercy. Its mostly emptied out, I am sure our rain has put quite a bit of water in there again that will need to be bailed out.

I am feeling okay. As good as can be expected. I just need to remember the side effects of Ixempra and this is a cakewalk. Its just getting tiring, this walk, I want to feel better again. I know I say that alot, but it is always pressing in my mind, when do I get well? When is this over? I see the path stretching before me and it is a very long path with no end in sight. It winds and twists and turns and I know somewhere far up head it will end and a new journey will start, one based on health instead of sickness and the battle of cancer.

Thank you to all who email, text and send me cards to stay in contact and keep my spirits up. You are my lifeline to the real world out there, the one I long to be a part of again, sooner rather than later! Watch out world, I will be back. I won't fade into the distance or go down easily, this is a fight I'm going to win.