Monday, September 7, 2009

Time.

Definitely starting to feel like fall out there. It was very cool sitting on the patio yesterday and the breeze was brisk and cool. Labor day. Not the technical end of the summer but the representative last weekend of the summer. It doesn’t seem possible, does it? Another summer gone by, summer 2009, all wrapped up. Time flies. We say that all the time, but it is so true. And it seems that the older we get the more expeditiously it flies by, like a commuter train, you are barely catching glimpses anymore of all that is happening around you. You feel like you are going from destination to destination and never getting a chance to really enjoy the journey between the two points in time. I want to slow it down. It’s moving too fast! I look at my daughter, my baby girl, and she is 17 and in her senior year in high school. How can that be? When did she get so grown up? How can it be that she will be starting adulthood in less than a year?

Time is so precious. We say that, but I don’t know if we take it to heart like we should. It is the one thing we seem to never have enough of. How many people say, “I wish there were more hours in the day” or at the end of the road say “I wish I’d had more time.” Time. The quintessential gift that you can give to yourself and to others. I was lucky enough to get to spend time with my family over the weekend. Holding Jessie in my lap, eating green chili burritos with the family (made by my mother!), spending the afternoon with my daughter decorating her room, planting blueberry bushes with Mike… its all a gift. And when I feel like I can't put one foot in front of the other, I don't have the energy for one more step, I think of the time that I would miss if I didn't take that step. How could I not take another step? Keep trying, keep going, keep on keeping on and garner every last second out of my life. Time. A most precious commodity.

I battle fatigue constantly. Some days my body doesn’t want to get up and keep going but I know that the hardest part is to make the first move. I sit in my chair and my body wants to just keep sitting. Sit and do nothing. But I know I must move. My get up and go hasn’t got up and went… it just needs a little encouragement! Once I get up and go, I feel better. And I will squeak just a little more of that precious time out of my life. Now, that feels good.