Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Maybe a Wig??

I totally overslept today. I had plans to get up by 7am so I could walk the dogs before it got too hot and I remember the alarm going off at 7am, but the next thing I knew it was 9am and I was still sleeping soundly. I had a hard time getting to sleep last night, seems every time I would doze off another firework would explode and Kyra would creep closer to me. I don’t think she could have slept any nearer to me!! I like the 4th of July, but I really hate the amateur firework pyrotechnics who seem to think the holiday should live on and on for weeks. They wreak havoc on my dog’s nervous systems for at least a week prior and it seems like weeks following the holiday. So, by the time I finally got to sleep last night I believe it was well after midnight and my body must have needed the extra rest. Although my counts were good last week, they were on their way down with the “nadir” (lowest point) being on day 10, which was Monday, and if you remember, that was the day that I really cratered and found myself almost unable to move during the afternoon. I am slowing working my way back out of that hole and today only feel like I weigh 700 pounds instead of 1000. So that must be an improvement! I have chemo tomorrow, so I’ll get my blood checked again this afternoon, but I am not anticipating any problems. I am sure we will be going forward with chemo, as scheduled.

I had a free facial at the Cancer Center yesterday. Every Tuesday, Sunny, former owner of Nuveau, gives free facials to cancer patients, and in all the years that I have been a patient, I have never taken advantage of it. Can you believe it?! It was amazing, relaxing, refreshing and totally healing. That woman has a therapeutic, curing touch and a loving healing heart. A stage 4 colon cancer survivor herself, she knows the right touch, the perfect words to say; she understands the way that a woman with cancer is feeling. It was a well spent hour and I plan on scheduling another one next month. She said that she will give me a free facial every month while I’m in treatment. Is that a great deal or what; like I always say, there has to be some perks to having brain tumors.

I ran into someone I know yesterday at the cancer center who is currently undergoing treatment and she was wearing a wig and I had no idea it was a wig. It looked completely natural and I thought she has just not lost her hair yet! It was crazy! So, after my facial I decided to look at the wigs and you know what, I think I found one that might work. So I brought it home to hold on to it and am trying to make an appointment with Frankie who styles wigs for woman undergoing cancer treatment.

Before bed last night, I sat down at my vanity and turned on the makeup light and put the stylish nylon stocking over my almost bald head. Then I put on the short reddish brown wig. Adjusted here and there and looked in the mirror. And cried. I looked like me again, except with a really round face. I looked like Patty. Like the woman I used to be over a year ago with short sassy hair tinted red. I looked like a woman again, not a cancer patient. And I cried and then I cried some more. Oh, to go out on a date or something and just be a woman out with her man, or a mother out with her children, or a girlfriend out with her gal pals. Just to be a woman out on the town, not receive the pity looks from people who just see an unfortunate woman with an incurable disease. A person that no one gives a second glance to, except to stare at her fabulous shoes. A regular person just like you.

So I have a call into Frankie and I am hoping she can get me in for a style and maybe next time you see me, you won’t recognize me, because I’ll be the one who looks so absolutely normal that your gaze will sweep on by, except for the amazing shoes, of course. I will be wearing magnificient shoes, even if they aren't heels! Wait and see!!!